Realization

My friend said twice...
"Girl you are sad,aren't you. I see grey color around you."
She's right.
I'm feeling blue.
It's only two days left here and then I'll be gone from this village for 2 months.
Lately I always complain about this empty town, quite village and crazy weather here, just like everyone else do.
It's just today my mind was telling me to take myself somewhere.
I let my feet took me to the abandoned yard behind the building.
As I walked further and further into the sedge field up hill,
There is the small stream flows down the mountain in the midst of trees.
It's not a quite place; birds,ants,insects,wind,sun,clouds,trees,rocks and me.
I climbed up and finally found myself nice rock by the stream to sit on.
Looking up through the swaying branches and leaves into the bright sky, clouds roled by and my tears fell down.
I realized It's my little girl who has been hidden inside of me for 5 months.
It's my little girl who slept inside of me for 5 months.
I told myself before that here,I feel like I can't find a friend that I can really talk to and will do understand my little girl inside.
But now I realized that it's me myself who always think that she's not belong here.
So I hide her deep inside, make she sleep and quite.
Day by day she has been neglected.
Without knowing she's so sad and cries inside of me.
Just today I know I don't need any other person to understand me but myself.
I need to be what I really am.
I have to nurture my own child.
I have to give her time to come around and play.
Let she thinks and talks.
Let she lives.
She needs no one but me.